Like I said, God's plans "look nothing like we anticipated." His plans are better.
The following day I contacted the person that was supposed to help us navigate fostering. I was so excited after I hit SEND that I couldn't stand it. Days passed and I thought since we were coming up to Thanksgiving that she was just busy. Okay, I get it. Holidays are a crazy time. I gave it another couple of weeks and still NOTHING. I thought they needed foster parents so desperately that they would be knocking on our door! I sent another email and by then Christmas had rolled around. NOTHING.
That's when my doubt kicked in again. What if this is NOT what we're supposed to do? What if the door was being closed? What if...What if...What if...??? How is it that I let doubt creep in so easily? It's because of fear. Fear of the risks. Fear of the failure. Fear.
What Holley wrote here spoke to my heart about my fear.
"I would even take it a step further and say that if you don't feel any fear at all, then it's probably not a God-sized dream. What makes you afraid? I don't mean the 'Eek! A spider!' kind of fear. I mean the idea that pops into your mind that makes your heart start to pound and your skin begin to sweat and yet you are strangely drawn to it anyway. THAT just might be your God-sized dream."
The following day I contacted the person that was supposed to help us navigate fostering. I was so excited after I hit SEND that I couldn't stand it. Days passed and I thought since we were coming up to Thanksgiving that she was just busy. Okay, I get it. Holidays are a crazy time. I gave it another couple of weeks and still NOTHING. I thought they needed foster parents so desperately that they would be knocking on our door! I sent another email and by then Christmas had rolled around. NOTHING.
That's when my doubt kicked in again. What if this is NOT what we're supposed to do? What if the door was being closed? What if...What if...What if...??? How is it that I let doubt creep in so easily? It's because of fear. Fear of the risks. Fear of the failure. Fear.
What Holley wrote here spoke to my heart about my fear.
"I would even take it a step further and say that if you don't feel any fear at all, then it's probably not a God-sized dream. What makes you afraid? I don't mean the 'Eek! A spider!' kind of fear. I mean the idea that pops into your mind that makes your heart start to pound and your skin begin to sweat and yet you are strangely drawn to it anyway. THAT just might be your God-sized dream."
My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways. -- Isaiah 55:8
On Christmas Eve I bumped into a friend at church who is currently going through the process and we were chatting about how things were going and when I told her they were going nowhere, she opened up about the agency her family decided to use. On the outside I think I showed my enthusiasm, but on the inside, I was a little reserved because I didn't want to have the disappointment of lack of communication. And that's HUGE for me. So I went home and she had sent me the info. Score. Some sort of communication there. I visited the website and fell in love with it. What they described was what I wanted from the get-go.
I contacted them via their intake form and after I hit "submit" the words, "We will contact you on the next business day," Again, due to the holidays, I wasn't going to hold my breath. To my surprise, I received a call the day after New Year's from one of their directors, Crystal. I was so nervous. We did a brief interview and later that night my man and I scheduled an in-person meeting with the Director of Admissions. What surprised me about the whole thing was that Crystal gave us her cell phone number after that initial call! We have access to help anytime we need it. And to think that they are providing this service before we even start our classes or are place with a child is AMAZING!
We toured the facility and asked some questions and when we got back to the car, the mood had changed. The tension had lifted. PEACE had settled in. We had a new plan of action.
And now I'm proud to say that step 1, the application, is completed!
I contacted them via their intake form and after I hit "submit" the words, "We will contact you on the next business day," Again, due to the holidays, I wasn't going to hold my breath. To my surprise, I received a call the day after New Year's from one of their directors, Crystal. I was so nervous. We did a brief interview and later that night my man and I scheduled an in-person meeting with the Director of Admissions. What surprised me about the whole thing was that Crystal gave us her cell phone number after that initial call! We have access to help anytime we need it. And to think that they are providing this service before we even start our classes or are place with a child is AMAZING!
We toured the facility and asked some questions and when we got back to the car, the mood had changed. The tension had lifted. PEACE had settled in. We had a new plan of action.
And now I'm proud to say that step 1, the application, is completed!
So don't give in to the doubt and the fear of whatever has been laid on your heart, whether it be foster care, adoption, homeschooling, starting a business, or writing a book. You've got something to give. Pursue it with everything you have and don't give up.
Don't let this world make you shut down and lock up what you're meant to share.